Writing Sample - Long Time No Anything

So, I have been posting this around and realized that I haven't posted here in forever. Work has eaten my writing! I think this belongs in my current work in progress, or one of them.

I know you want me to shut up. I know how much you want me to stop talking about how we have lost our freedom, how our government has been stolen, about our murdered liberty, and our violated and beaten rights. I know you want me to stop telling you about the corporations and men in power raped Lady Liberty then left her discarded, like a Muslim immigrant, on the Boston shore amongst the refuse, contaminated syringes, discarded condoms, and used packets of lightly sweetened, freedom flavored tea her only company. You're not alone.

Everyone wants to silence me, begs me to put the gag in. You scream in a voice that echoes with their's. The two groups scramble over each other to burn the first amendment. I don't know who's worse, the ones telling me to shut up and check my privilege. Screaming at me to be silent, to let the victims speak. To stay out of the conversation and just let it play out, to nod along encouragingly while others write the world, to watch without condemning or condoning. On the other side stand those that shout in my ear that it is in my best interest to be still. They want me to just watch as others are oppressed and enslaved. Just keep calm and let us put them back in check. It's not your concern, after all, they tell me. You're nothing like them. Just hush, go back to sleep and let us do our work. Stay where you are and you'll be safe.

What nobody wants, is for me to speak. No. None of you want me to talk about the truth I see. You don't want the uncomfortable visions of a freed mind. No matter what side they're on, hell, no matter what side you're on, there is one thing you want. You want me to sit on the couch, staring into the television. You want me to watch the stars and wait for the end of the world, with a Xanax smile, just like everyone else.

I just can't do it. I'm too busy weeping for all of you that can.

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Prostrating Westward

On a man's wedding day he is supposed to be the third happiest person in the room, except when he is fifth or sixth. Normally his joy is dwarfed only by that of the bride and her mother. Then there are weddings like mine.

In a wedding like mine the groom can be fifth or sixth. They come in after the beaming joy of both mothers, two fathers relieved they get to see their son married after all, and before or after the other groom.

So, there I was, staring into his eyes. Dueling crying mothers sounding in the background. The justice of the peace droning on with words that, if my parent's had their wish, should have been droned by a clergyman. I didn't care about things like that though.

When our eyes met, I was purely happy. So was he. That was what mattered to me. Then the jay pee said the dreaded words. There were concerns you see. My ex was... well, a bit psycho is putting it mildly. Psychotically dedicated to things best forgotten would be a bit more accurate.

It was like a Clark Gable movie, well, and edgy Gable movie. The Justice spoke to the heavens and the heathens. "Should anyone here present know of any reasons that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace."

I looked around. I had nightmares about this all week. I knew it was going to happen, even as I hoped that it wouldn't. It all came undone, just as I dreamed.

The doors burst open. As one, my ex streamed in. The whole group of them carrying their trademark signs.

Jesus will laugh when you have AIDEs - Read one.

Reenact Soddom - Said a second.

And, of course, the classic that would never die - God hates fags!!!

There were many, many others. Most of them were variations of those three though. I saw microphones in some off hands too.

My ex, and they never gave up. He started ululuating and I started crying. Our mothers bemoaned our fate and the destruction of their special day. Then the chanting started.

Long story short? Most of the guests fell into the background in horror. Unable to raise their hands against religious men and women. No matter how zealotous and evil they were. Not everyone was willing to stand passively by.

After years of questionable acceptance, some men will fight for their sons when a threat comes from the outside. Other men are willing to take on the wrath of heaven itself for what they believe in and those that they love.

That's why I'm here. It's supposed to be my honeymoon. Instead of Paris I'm sitting on a hard bench. Waiting to bail out my father, father in law, and new husband. Yes, husband. Thank God some officiants can get the "I Dos" out quickly.




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Something Different - Kind Of

So this week's writing prompt is a goal/resolution list. I don't intend to re-post that here. A few months back I determined it was time to start being more open. Honestly most of my thoughts recently have been angry. I see people just not getting it. People who don't realize that when they try to fix a problem they focus on the wrong things. People not realizing that you have to think through what you say. People want change, I get that, we all do. However, we forget to look at the point, the basic truth, of what we are screaming about and it robs our message of its power and prestige. Some of these recent thoughts I have actually still held back on.

I am not holding back because they will make me look like an asshole. To some people they would, but those people wouldn't get it anyway. I know I'm not for everyone and I'm done trying to be. I like to think that most people out there will get that ideas need to be free. So I think I'm for most people but if some can't respect that I'm okay with that. I respect them and their right to disagree. The only people that really piss me off are the ones that yell without listening.

So, where is this coming from? I shouldn't read the news, that's where. No tinfoil hats here, I don't go in for conspiracy theories. However, I think it goes without saying that those who have power will do what they need to to keep it. Which is sad, because those with power should serve not expect to be served. I've been thinking a lot about how the two major parties in the US accuse each other of fear mongering and distorting the truth. The sad thing is, it is just what they want us to be afraid of. The Republicans want us to be afraid of external threats and killer diseases. The Democrats want us to be afraid of how society will break down if we aren't all kind to each other. Ignore honesty, we have to be politically correct and not hurt each other's feelings. Of course real concerns like how many people are still out of work never seem to enter into it.

What really started all this was a report about Putin's biggest rival in Russia and how his brother with jailed. It's a pretty damn sad story. I'm not going to say Russia doesn't have problems, and it's a pretty scary place to stand up for your rights from what I've seen. I have no first hand experience though. What struck me as odd was a comment in this report about how the US had strong concerns about what this meant for the future of Russia. The implication being the government was cracking down on the citizens and it was so bad.

My question is this. Why do we get to have an opinion these days? In the "pursuit of safety" we have done the same thing. Maybe it's not on the same level but it's there. I keep seeing these reports about kids getting arrested for things they say on social media, about threats to their schools and friends. I remember a time in my life when to go to jail you had to have two things. First was a crime, second was criminal intent. The idea of arresting someone for thinking about something is a big part of Orwell's 1984 and we are all terrified of this concept and where it leads. We all hated that Russia did these things years ago. Yet these days we are so concerned with being safe that we turn a blind eye to this. We know it leads down a dangerous path but we don't look at the bottom of the slope to where we might end up.

Yes, so far we are not too far down. We still try to do the right thing but the road to hell is, as they say, paved with good intentions. I don't think anyone is looking to the future saying 'Thirty more steps to an oppressive society' but we need to be aware of what we are doing. More importantly we need to remember that we have no right to judge another country until we fix the problems in our own. We need to wake up, be aware, and just realize that we are on the edge of a cliff. Are choices are simple, accept we prefer the illusion of safety to freedom and step off, figure out how to walk that fine balance and stop judging others doing the same, or as a whole decide to step back and realize that freedom is worth the risk. Mostly though we need to spend less time on judging and more time on getting right with ourselves. Life is hard enough. How about we stop making it harder for people who are none of our concern and start making it easier for our neighbors? Because most people are hurting right now and could use a helping hand.

Okay, I probably seem crazy to some people, but I'm okay with that. Just remember at the end of the day there are only two places freedom actually counts. The freedom to think what you want, and the freedom to say what you want. We each have a responsibility to each other. To defend those rights for others even, and especially, when we disagree with what they think or say. It is easy to defend someone when you are on their side. However, when you say the opposition shouldn't have the same rights as your friends you become a closed minded oppressor. Nobody wants to be a part of the problem but it is easy to become that without trying or even realizing that you are.

Just think it through and realize one thing. It is easy to point a finger and say, that's wrong. It is harder to look inside and see the same problem that needs cleaning up. In everything you do think first, how do I fix the personal problem? Do this in your personal life, your family life, and your community. You will find when you do that others try to follow. That's how you fix the world and those around you, by being an example. Of course Russia doesn't want to be like the US. We can't agree on anything. We arrest people for reasons the rest of the world can't understand. We censor people for having independent thoughts. Then we tell them not to do the same. If we fixed our shit others would follow, but nobody likes being yelled at by a hypocrite.

Okay, this is a long, rambling rant. In the end it comes to this. Protect your freedoms and express yourself. Stand for the freedoms of others even if you disagree with their message. Remember that all freedom beyond thought and speech are just words, and that is what makes them real because they are based in the true great ones. Live a life worthy of being an example and see how it changes the world. Last, but certainly not least, live a life of art and beauty. Create something and support the creations of others. Because art changes the world and makes life worth living. That expression keeps us free.







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